Khorn
04-10-2003, 09:27 AM
Do you use your sound system only for MUSIC?.....Shame on you. Maximize the potential of your system by some of the following applications:
Environmental Enhancement of your neighbourhood, turn your speakers toward your windows and play the following at high volumes:
The Cry Of Wild Screeching Parrots
The thundering hooves of a vast heard of Buffalo (including the obligatory fires)
The cry of a wild TIGER lost in the WOODS.....FORE
The squawking of a Sasquwatch
The call of a wild MOOSE! (but keep your doors locked!)
and many others too numerous to mention.
Health Applications:
If your system is capable of prodigious low frequency response and high output:
A Back Massage by shaking the chair you are seated in.
Place your feet in a tub of warm water, the sound waves will give you a terrific foot massage! (you can also add some dish soap and dishes, thus killing two birds (parrots?) with one frequency so to speak).
A painful High Frequency Tone so you will forget about a bad headache if you have one.
and many other applications too numerous to mention
Cost Savings & Conservation of Energy: If you have a class 'A' type amplifier you may:
Turn of the furnace and let the amp heat your house.
Place a Teflon Griddle on top of the amp for cooking purposes allowing you to both cook with the amp and sell the stove to buy more discs.
(probably easier to sell the stove than a used furnace)
Use Your Sound System Just for MUSIC? I don't think so.
In future installments I'll describe how you can use your turntable to power a Grist Mill....Yummm.
Environmental Enhancement of your neighbourhood, turn your speakers toward your windows and play the following at high volumes:
The Cry Of Wild Screeching Parrots
The thundering hooves of a vast heard of Buffalo (including the obligatory fires)
The cry of a wild TIGER lost in the WOODS.....FORE
The squawking of a Sasquwatch
The call of a wild MOOSE! (but keep your doors locked!)
and many others too numerous to mention.
Health Applications:
If your system is capable of prodigious low frequency response and high output:
A Back Massage by shaking the chair you are seated in.
Place your feet in a tub of warm water, the sound waves will give you a terrific foot massage! (you can also add some dish soap and dishes, thus killing two birds (parrots?) with one frequency so to speak).
A painful High Frequency Tone so you will forget about a bad headache if you have one.
and many other applications too numerous to mention
Cost Savings & Conservation of Energy: If you have a class 'A' type amplifier you may:
Turn of the furnace and let the amp heat your house.
Place a Teflon Griddle on top of the amp for cooking purposes allowing you to both cook with the amp and sell the stove to buy more discs.
(probably easier to sell the stove than a used furnace)
Use Your Sound System Just for MUSIC? I don't think so.
In future installments I'll describe how you can use your turntable to power a Grist Mill....Yummm.