Favorite television edit of a movie's dialogue?

[PaulKTF]

I love watching my favorite movies on TV just to see what they replace the swearing and "bad" language with. What's your favorite example of this?

My favorite is the network TV version of Scarface! "Where'd you get that scar? Eatin' pineapple?".

If there has been a thread about this before; my apologies, and please point me to it so I can read it. :)

[stereoptic]

"Melon farmers" from the broadcast TV version of 'Repo Man'

[phallumontis]

The Big Lebowski:

"This is what happens, Larry! This is what happens when you find a stranger in the alps!"

or

"The peed on your valued rug."

[Cheepnik]

"Melon farmers" from the broadcast TV version of 'Repo Man'

Definitely. Somebody had fun during that looping session.

I think the guys on Mr. Show had that one in mind when they did their edited-for-TV version of GoodFellas: "Motherfather Chinese dentist!"

And really, has anyone ever said "Son of a buck!" in real life?

[vinnie]

Definitely. Somebody had fun during that looping session.

I think the guys on Mr. Show had that one in mind when they did their edited-for-TV version of GoodFellas: "Motherfather Chinese dentist!"

And really, has anyone ever said "Son of a buck!" in real life?

Yep. My dad.

[oblique_parallax]

I've always wondered why the "eat my shorts" line in The Breakfast Club was changed to "eat my socks."

[Jimbo]

Paulie to Rocky: "Are you dirtyin' my sister?" What are they, making mudpies?

Weird: Saw a broadcast of Blazing Saddles in which Madeline Kahn's character's name was shortened to "Lili von Shtuh..." Somebody must've looked up "Shtupp" in a Yiddish dictionary.

[guy incognito]

Ginger (Sharon Stone) in Casino:

"Freak you, Sam! Freak you! Freeeak you!"

[mr_mjb1960]

The infamous "TV Edit" of "Willy Wonka & the Chocolate Factory" at the end so you couldn't see what happened to those other kids who didn't fare so well,unlike Charlie! That ending INFURIATED ME TO NO END!!:realmad: WHY WOULD THEY DO THAT??:shake: Michael Boyce

[virgil caine]

The Breakfast Club

[Walt]

Tremors: Kevin Bacon's character yells "FOOLED YOU" to tremor-thingamabob after either killing it or tearing off a limb...

[Keim]

Austin Powers: Allota Fagina is changed to Allota Cleavage. I like the 2nd more, personally. But, how is one less likely to offend?

[reechie]

Mallrats. They got another actor to dub in the replacement lines for Jason Mewes! :biglaugh:

[lasvidfil]

The infamous "TV Edit" of "Willy Wonka & the Chocolate Factory" at the end so you couldn't see what happened to those other kids who didn't fare so well,unlike Charlie! That ending INFURIATED ME TO NO END!!:realmad: WHY WOULD THEY DO THAT??:shake: Michael Boyce

Do you mean the Johnny Depp version? I don't recall anything in the original that let you see what happened to the rest of the kids.

[BeatleJWOL]

It's always fun watching Pulp Fiction on TV... :sigh:

[Winter Hugohalter]

In the first broadcast version of "The Sunshine Boys" years ago, "Putz" was changed to "Schmo"
There were several scenes from "Animal House" that were shot twice, the original theatrical scenes and alternate "clean" versions for TV. After Neidermeyer's horse drops dead in Wormer's office, Bluto keeps repeating "I don't believe it!" instead of "Holy *****!"
The car rental scene in "Planes, Trains And Automobiles" which is probably the funniest scene in the entire movie was also shot twice, the sanitized version is not funny at all.
In "Smokey And The Bandit" Jackie Gleason's "Son' B*tch" has been replaced with "Scum Bum"... Who's ever said that?

[Captain Groovy]

National Lampoon's Vacation. Clark asking for directions from the pimp with his "ladies" while stuck in Detroit.

Clark: "Excuse me, do you know the way back to the freeway?"

Pimp: "Hey, yo f-- yo mama!"

Clark: "Thank you very much!"

Edited pimp line: "What do I look like, Christopher Columbo?"

At least they tried a new joke and not just an edit!

Jeff

[imagnrywar]

lots of great edits in Happy Gilmore... can't remember them right now though. anyone?

[cooper16]

National Lampoon's Vacation. Clark asking for directions from the pimp with his "ladies" while stuck in Detroit.

Clark: "Excuse me, do you know the way back to the freeway?"

Pimp: "Hey, yo f-- yo mama!"

Clark: "Thank you very much!"

Edited pimp line: "What do I look like, Christopher Columbo?"

At least they tried a new joke and not just an edit!

Jeff

Another edit from the same movie that always confused me:

Eddie's Daughter to Audrey: "Do you french kiss?"

Audrey: "Everybody french kisses."

Eddie's Daughter: "Yea, but Daddy says I'm The best."

In the TV edit, they change "Daddy" to "my teacher."

How is that any less offensive? :shake:



In Caddyshack at the end of the movie Al Czervik says "Hey everybody, let's go get laid!"

On The TV version they change the line to: "Hey everybody, let's go take a shower!"

I don't see why they even needed to change the original line. The prospect of the entire cast engaged in a naked group shower scene is much more offensive to me. :D

[Chip TRG]

Smokey And The Bandit (and the sequal) where Buford T. Justice, who now sounds like the second Fred Flintstone, utters nothing but the phrase "SCUM BUM!"

They even redubbed lines that had NO profanity in them originally!

[guy incognito]

Navin R. Johnson's dog, "S***head", becomes "Stupid" when The Jerk runs on TV.

Jakes's confrontation with The Penguin in The Blues Brothers, where he tells her she's "really up s*** creek" and then continues swearing while she beats him with a ruler, is completely ruined by TV bowdlerization.

[The Panda]

Paulie to Rocky: "Are you dirtyin' my sister?" What are they, making mudpies?

Weird: Saw a broadcast of Blazing Saddles in which Madeline Kahn's character's name was shortened to "Lili von Shtuh..." Somebody must've looked up "Shtupp" in a Yiddish dictionary.
Yep. Me, too. Thought My hearing was going, at first.

[blind_melon1]

My favourite was in Beverly Hills Cop III

Should we use swat?
"Swat swatta"
Thats what I thought "Swat swatta"

Hahahahah

[blind_melon1]

Navin R. Johnson's dog, "S***head", becomes "Stupid" when The Jerk runs on TV.

Jakes's confrontation with The Penguin in The Blues Brothers, where he tells her she's "really up s*** creek" and then continues swearing while she beats him with a ruler, is completely ruined by TV bowdlerization.

Blues Brothers got destroyed (almost as bad as Pulp Fiction), the Nazi scene was also ruined.

[Pinknik]

I can't remember it exactly, but the line from Long Duk Dong in 16 Candles that goes, "No more yanky my wanky" becomes some nonsensical thing like "No more yanky ron dranky". Very odd.